There is Someone with whom I have Unfinished Business.
It haunts me; it comes and goes from my uppermost thoughts, restlessly wandering from the forefront to the back of my mind and through all the chambers in~between; it hovers in the entranceways and exits, never fully manifesting in the physical world, never entirely forgotten for good.
My office has just hired That Someone's Doppelganger.
Curiously enough, the doppelganger is from a different ethnic background, yet there's an uncannily strong resemblance nonetheless... as if Synchronicity is reminding me that It has a whimsical sense of humour {as opposed to Its cousin, Fate, Who favours irony}.
More like as not, it's just my imagination playing tricks on me.*
But it still feels weird, in all senses of the word.
I find myself fooled into holding eye contact for just a wee bit too long than is proper with a stranger, expecting to see something there that I recognise, expecting to be returned a look of recognition.
While I am resigned that my unfinished business will remain unresolved, there are rare moments when I imagine that if it is not resolved in my lifetime then I myself may as a shade similarly continue to wander, seeking closure.**
Sigh. I'm just an old pack rat that can't let go of anything, including the emotional baggage leftover from relationships that have broken beyond repair.
Hope it doesn't ruin things between me & this new acquaintance.
~ ~ ~
* Have since submitted question of resemblance to independant experts for authentication; authentication failed, debunking doppleganger theory; received instead a diagnosis of post~traumatic stress syndrome.
** yes, a shade looking for closure, like those horrible old spring-loaded roll-down blinds which never stay put, especially in the dead of night; always the sufferers of startled contractions ending in a heart~stopping flapflapflap~banging, keenest yearnings for closure constantly thwarted by their own inner tensions. ;)
Posted by edgar at June 13, 2003 11:21 AM