Saw a lovely bird the other day: a black bird with brilliant red patches on its wings ~ well, on its shoulders, really. And I thought, red... shoulders... red/rouge... shoulders/epaulettes... a little black bird with red epaulettes. I wonder, I said to myself, I wonder what it's called...
Looked it up today, & yup, you guessed it... it is known as the carouge à épaulette, or, the red~winged blackbird.
{wallop~palm~to~forehead}
Great! Now I'm an idiot in both official languages. :P
That's got to be construed as some sort of improvement, somehow...
Hard Core Ice Cream
Move aside, Cherry Garcia; now we have Ozzy's Carnivorous Carrot Cake and Death by Sharon.
"Ozzy's is a cinnamon spice ice cream with carrot cake soaked in hazelnut liqueur. Death by Sharon is a deep dark chocolate ice cream with dark chocolate fudge and bits of chocolate brownie soaked in Godiva liqueur."
If some ice~cream company were to invent a flavour and name it in your honour... what would it be, and what would they call it?
This Mousehat is ever in a state of constant dither, and thus cannot decide between:
Little White Mousehat ~~ sake sorbet with flecks of mint & ginger.
Mousehat Mumble ~~ coffee~flavoured frozen yogurt with cardamom seeds, perhaps lightly spiced with nutmeg, ground clove & orange zest.
MouseMarbles ~~ toffee bits in a french vanilla ice cream marbled with a syrup of butterscotch schnapps.
Mousehat Extra Stout ~~ why, Guinness~flavoured, of course. :)
Hmmm... it may be time to consider buying an ice~cream maker...
Men, if you already have performance anxiety, then I warn you: read no further.
~ ~ ~
"The process of accepting foreign cells is called immune modulation.
"After intercourse, a woman's immune system sends cells to the cervix to collect the father's foreign proteins to take back to the lymph nodes so that other immune cells can recognise them.
"The Adelaide team suggests semen contains an agent which prompts the woman's immune system to accept it.
"Sometimes, this process fails and women can have a severe immune response, which could be as serious as anaphylactic shock."
~ ~ ~
That's anaphylactic shock as in "The most severe type of anaphylaxis is termed anaphylactic shock, which may lead to circulatory collapse and death."
I think that the only thing that could possibly be more difficult than being deathly allergic to sperm would have to be hearing people make the same damn cracks about allergies to nuts, over and over again, for the rest of your quasi~celibate life...
There was a wee toddler being pushed in a stroller. She was playing with the fabric of her skirt, and with great giggly glee suddenly pulled it up over her head.
Nevermind that it was the depths of Canadian winter, and the youngster was wearing arctic~rated thermal underwear and leg warmers in addition to diapers; the mother struck faster than a commando. She yanked the skirt back down & snapped, What did I tell you about showing your glory to the world?
* * *
In addition to thinking, now, how's that going to mess her up when she's older? and what's so wrong about showing your glory to the world, really? it got me thinking about the meaning & usage of the word; and I was reminded of it again when I came across this article on the glory ~~ an atmospheric optical phenomenon in which a round rainbow appears around the shadow of your head. It's because of all those poetic connotations that the word "glory" has to be one of my all time favourite euphemisms for the, well, you know, that, uh, thingy* we like to euphemize.**
~ ~ ~
* Hmph. "Thingy." Makes it sound like a dohicky, or a futzimawhatzit. "Hello, Thing~ma~jig? Meet Thingy~ma~bob!" Yup, we don't really know how they work; we just fool around with 'em...
** Incidentally, the best nickname I ever heard for the male euphemism was when a character on The Chris Isaak Show referred to his own as "The Ambassador".